It's the small things that count

Pluck this little flower and take it, delay not! I fear lest it droop and drop into the dust.

I may not find a place in thy garland, but honour it with a touch of pain from thy hand and pluck it. I fear lest the day end before I am aware, and the time of offering go by.

Though its colour be not deep and its smell be faint, use this flower in thy service and pluck it while there is time.

Rabindranath Tagore

Beautiful day. It's a choice.

Life is a journey,
Not a destination,
There are no mistakes,
Just chances we've taken
Lay down your regrets cause
all we have is now

Wake up in the morning
And get out of bed
Start making a mental list in my head
Of all of the things that I am grateful for

Early in the morning
it's the dawn of a new day
New hopes new dreams new ways
I open up my eyes and
I open up my mind and
I wonder how life will surprise me today
Early in the morning
it's the dawn of a new day
New hopes new dreams new ways
I open up my heart and
I'm gon’ do my part and
Make this a positively beautiful day

Life is a challenge not a competition
You can still smell the roses
and be on a mission
Just take a moment to get in
touch with your heart
Sometimes you feel like
you've got something to prove
Remind yourself that there's only one you
Just take a moment to give
thanks of who you are

Let’s make this a wonderful
Let’s make this a powerful
Let’s make this a Beautiful Day
it's a Beautiful Day

"Beautiful Day" India Arie

Just Pray.

It’s not so difficult. It’s really not complicated. You just pray.

Why is it that I’ve been able to submit some things to Christ, but tightly hold on to others? I just met with my research assistant and went over my questions that I will use to interview people about their growing up discriminated against because of their caste. At the end she prayed for me. She committed everything to God. My paper, what I write, who I interview, everything. She prayed this prayer with such sincerity, really relying on God to guide me. During the prayer she recited Psalms 121 which begins with “I look to the mountains-does my help come from there? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth!” It gave me such peace to know that during this time of research and school I simply need to call upon God to give me strength. And he REALLY does care about my research, each word I type, everything.

He says: “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks the door will be opened.” Matthew 7:7-8

He tells us to not doubt “But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.” James 1:6

I don’t think I mean a lot of the prayers I really pray. I don’t think God will really answer them, that’s why I pray them every day. Haha. If I just prayed them with such sincerity of heart, I’m sure I wouldn’t spend so much time on the same prayers-for years. I would expand my concerns to things far greater than me.

My team was talking about a conference/meeting they have in the north where everyone gathers with the sick. People travel so far with their animals to have them prayed over so they will be healed. It sounds funny at first, to pray for your cow to be healed. But when you think about it, if you have no money to buy a new cow, if you have no way of replacing the cow, you will do ANYTHING to have that cow healed-you depend on God, because God is the only one who can do something. I was thinking about if I was in that situation I would simply buy a new cow, or a tractor for that matter. I wouldn’t ask God to heal it. I might not even think of it. Maybe I would pray, but in the back of my mind I would be thinking about how I could just buy another one.
I am gaining confidence in the prayers I pray, I’m learning to back my prayers up with sincere faith. It’s hard removing the world from my heart, but I’m trying to do that, and allow faith in Jesus to fill that spot.

life is wild.

Yesterday night I attended the graduation for the 10th grade class of the Good Shepherd High School, along with the Teachers Training program which sends teachers out into the Good Shepherd schools. I watched as one graduate cried on her mother’s shoulder. I’m sure her tears weren’t saying “Thank you it’s finally over!” as mine would have said, but I imagine her tears were saying “Thank you God for educating me, for caring enough about me to allow me to carve a future for myself that is different than the rest of the women of my village”

At school the children all look so nice in their uniforms, and like they could come from the nicest of homes. But really most of these kids come from little shacks, homes built of pipes, or an orphanage. Most of the members of their families are illiterate and work hard labored jobs. God has placed this school in this community so that these specific children can get an education. One of the speakers asked the graduates who would pursue a career that would allow them to give back to their community of the Dalits. Each one of the students stood up. These kids know the blessing of their education and will not take advantage of it.

I often times find myself telling people back in the US that life is just life here, nothing special or different, just a daily routine. One day after saying this I had a prayer meeting with my team. I don’t know how I ever thought that life here was nothing special. As I dug into prayer I realized the heaviness and seriousness of my life. I’m in the midst of people who are tormented by spiritual warfare, with witchcraft being done on them, evil spirits invading their lives. God has chosen ME to be HERE. It really could be seen as mundane and an everyday task, anyone can think that about their life, but anyone can also see each day as the wildest day ever. I’m thankful that God has revealed this to me.

Life is wild, no matter where you live and what you do. Many of us have the opportunity to breathe, to embrace the sunshine, to laugh, sing, rejoice and praise God. Let’s do that today.

God is good.

I began my 24th year in life by a grand adventure into Bharat (India). After many hours, maybe days, I don't even know how long it took, I arrived. Barely able to keep my eyelids open, I waited at the airport for an hour to be picked up. I shamefully walked back and forth through the line of drivers holding signs for the strangers they were to pick up multiple times. The women dressed in saris trying to go down the escalator but constantly failing and holding up loads of people was sheer entertainment for me. It brought a smile to my face each time I saw a new woman have her try. It was here modern India and the rest of her people mixed.
I can confidently tell you that God knows me well and loves me much. Oh, God knows me sooo well. There are more gardens than I can count on this campus. Everywhere I look, there are the MOST beautiful flowers ever. They aren’t your ordinary rose bushes, or other plain flowers, but they are the most beautiful, colorful, exotic flowers. My gaze is constantly fixed on the beautiful flowers that I pass as I walk. It is a constant reminder that God loves me.
Three times a day is like my most dreaded time of my sophomore year of High School when I first moved to Colorado-LUNCH. You know when you don’t have any friends-well, I didn’t, and you scan the cafeteria and wonder which batch of people you might try to sit with? It’s not so bad. It’s good that God has grown in me and I am not that shy sophomore anymore. I like it actually. I look around the cafeteria and wonder which group of girls I will meet today. It’s a hit or miss. Some meals I sit with girls who don’t speak English, and the conversation goes nowhere. Eating with strangers is a humbling experience. I feel like a fool as it takes me much longer than everyone else to finish my meal, as I have not perfected the hand shovel. Thankfully two groups have told me they really appreciate me eating their way. There is a group of 5 women from Bangalore and Kerala who are here for a VBS training camp and I have shared a few meals with them. They are in their 50’s probably and have the sweetest spirits. They were my first friends who welcomed me here. My most blessed meal was last night when I sat with three girls and found they were Masters of Divinity students who speak excellent English. I pray and hope I will remember their faces and be able to continue a friendship with them. When I do have the opportunity to talk with some girls, it always turns out so positive. I see their deep trust in God being in control of their lives. They confidently look up at the sky and tell me that God is in control. It has blessed me so much.
Another woman I have been so blessed by is Vanita, my coworker. We have spent the last two days sorting through Barbies (don’t ever send Barbie to India, they are far too scandalous. My other coworker Annimma told me that she did not want to teach such ways to the children), books, Matt and Creighton’s counting books, and whatever America has chosen to send to India. Some of the things we sort through is such junk. Toys we have no idea how to use, the Guiness Book of World Records 1985, or “How to prepare yourself for a roadtrip with your teenager”. Vanita and Annimma are so thankful for each item though. Their tender spirit of gratitude is so contagious. Throughout the day I hear Vanita speaking with God. “Lord help me sort through these books” “Give me the discernment to know how to sort these” “Oh Lord thank you for all these things”. It is the most precious and beautiful thing. We pray all the time. We pray when we begin the day, they stop and pray for people passing by, there is never a bad time to pray.
It’s only my third day here, but I feel God has taught me so much. I feel SO blessed to be here and so fortunate to have this experience. I also am so thankful for my time in the desert. After going through that quite difficult time, I have such a deeper appreciation for everything. I hope I never lose that. I am just so thankful for everything.
Slow down, smell the beautiful flowers. Live for the moment. Cherish the life you have been given. Thank the Lord for all things.

arrival in india

I’ve packed my bags and moved onto my new home for the next 4 months-Jaipur, India. My time in Hawaii was absolutely lovely. Home is where the heart is and my heart is definitely in Hawaii, so I guess therefore Hawaii has become my home. My weeks in Hawaii were slammed packed with prayer, Bible studying, feeding 500-700 families a week, teaching swim/surf lessons to kids from shelters in Waianae (the Hawaiian side of the island that is loaded with drug abuse and homelessness) and my favorite-cruzing with the street and park dwellers of Wahiawa. Hospitality and being in the neighborhood as much as possible has been really heavy on my mind the past month. I’ve been pushed to love more and become more a part of the community. One day we prayed for the community of Wahiawa-the prostitutes, transvestites, alcoholics and drug addicts. During our time of prayer I thought of the idea of going up California street (the street where all the action takes place) and handing out flowers to the women we came across. I wasn’t going to let this idea get away from me, so that week a group of 5 of us left our apartments at 11:00 at night (I generally am in bed by 10, so this was a stretch for me) and walked up the streets and were ready to love anyone that came in our path. Right as we began our walk I was plagued with thoughts rolling through my head. I was afraid that maybe it would be offensive, or belittling to the women, or we would be rejected. The enemy always tries to destroy something good through confusion. We carried on though and I began to pray that I would come in contact with the women that came to our Friday BBQs in the park. Most of the girls we saw out that night were ladies that came to our BBQ. It was so exciting to see them at night, some of them were working the street and others were just cruzing. We also chilled outside the Texas Strip Bar with some of the local guys till early in the morning. It was so good to meet these people in the time of day that they thrive. The people of Wahiawa are such night owls. I know that giving the flowers to the girls really meant a lot to them. It was an action of pure love with no personal agenda attached.
There are many sides to my time in Hawaii. Sometimes I wonder if God has me cruzing with the street and park dwellers for their sake or mine? He tends to teach me more lessons than I could possibly teach them. Other than the social aspect of being in Hawaii, it was a time for me to prepare to come to India spiritually. The environment of Surfing the Nations always amps me up and sets me on the right course.
Now I am in India. I’m across the world far from anyone I know and yet I don’t feel like I’m in a foreign uncomfortable place. I haven’t really had the opportunity to get out into the community yet as we have been in orientation for the last few days but that will change soon. I will meet my host family on Friday. My mom is a yoga master, I don’t know much about my father, I have a sister and grandmother. That’s about the extent of the information I have been given. I am looking forward to all that God will teach me in India. My anticipation is that God will open my eyes to new things I have not seen before and drive my passion for the poor even deeper. My biggest prayer this summer has been for God to provide an Indian woman to be a mentor, friend and someone who teaches me about following Christ in India. You can be praying for God to reveal the ways He wants to use me within my study abroad group and in my community. I really have no expectations or ideas of how God will use me, but I wait patiently and hope God will unfold that secret in the right time.
Until more adventures head my way, make sure you love all those around you.

pressing, pushing and character building

Hitch-hiking, camping, surfing, swim lessons, figuring out how to cook, rice and chilli making, learning to play the guitar, investing time in my Surfing the Nations family, pushing myself to meet new people, wedding and Luau on the beach, eating poke and taco (raw fish and octopus), Acai bowls (delicious blended fruit mix from the amazon), prayer, fasting, bible studying and character building. These are just a few of the things I've taken part of in my last few weeks since the last blog.
Amidst the crammed pack daily schedule of living and being apart of Surfing the Nations is the cruz mellow mentality of Hawaii. Last night I fell alseep to the neighborhood guys jamming to the ukulele. Everywhere I walk in Wahiawa people are hanging out whether that is at 7-11, the park or parking lots, people are lounging and enjoying life. Sometimes I can get so carried away with doing and going and whats next on my schedule that it is really nice to realize I can just sit and enjoy the moment.
Pressing on my mind and heart is trying to build relationships with the community of Wahiawa that does not live in houses. There are so many homeless people that live in Wahiawa. Its not like the mainland where you rarely see a homeless person unless you are driving around downtown or are in a big city. Here living in the parks, parking lots and forests is just another way of life. Although it is another way of life, there is still the community of people that live in the comfort of their home and are bothered by people crowding "their" sidewalks and parks, and the sight of people living on nothing is a soar in their eye. As I was saying in my last blog, I know I have been allowed the gift of life so that I can love these people. This doesn't mean its always easy though. For a girl from the mainland it takes a lot of effort to give my all to building relationships. It takes an active mind that won't allow inferiority, insecurity or awkwardness get in the way of getting to know them. Loving and caring for people takes a lot of initiative, courage, and vulnerability. Its not always easy. It's good to have that push though.
I imagine the community thinks that I am one strange girl. On tuesday and friday afternoons I can be found either carrying a rice cooker, pot of chilli up a few blocks to the nearest park. Sometimes I can be found carrying a box of food bags up the street as well. Why use our trucks and vans to drive up the street two block when God gave me a perfectly healthy body that can carry things?? So I carry these things to two different groups of guys that hang out a few blocks away. There's a group of 4-6 guys that hang out next to the KFC parking lot and are drinking at all hours of the day. I think I'm about getting to the point where I am not that awkward girl that comes to hang out with them. Then there's the Center Street Park crew that sits back and drinks as well. Pray for me as I try to build relationships with these guys. Its such a bust that I will only be here for 2 months. Lets hope and trust that God will use me in this short amount of time!
What I love about being in this community is the push and shove that I am constantly feeling. Whether that comes from my room mates and friends, or from the Holy Spirit, I'm never allowed to slip into a complacent life. Its a continuous challenge to sharpen and shape my character. My apartment is full of appologies and forgiveness. Cindy's teachings are continuously challenging me to be a better person. I feel as though I'm doing the dishes non stop and picking up after myself non stop. I really don't enjoy doing these things but it is sharpening my character into becoming more responsible and caring more for my room mates. Doing the right things is definately not always easy, but it is such a fulfilling feeling when its past to know th at I was stretched and did what was right.
My parting words for anyone who reads this blog is to not sit on your couch and watch TV. Go do something. Love deeper, more painfully and sacrificially. When you feel that tension of being pressed to do something, you'll feel the rewarding feeling of knowing you've impacted the world.

"I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love."

Mother Theresa